An old Chinese proverb says that you gain a day in longevity for every new thing you try. Why not see how many extra days you can clock up?
New-fangled stuff shouldn’t unnerve you as trying new things is the way we stay young at heart and interested in life.
While at university, my friends kept asking me if I had an email address. ‘Don’t be silly,’ I said. ‘It’ll never catch on. I much prefer a letter.’ Thankfully I’m not a future trend predictor as emails definitely did catch on. I do still prefer a letter but I can also laugh at my foolish younger self who had no idea how much time I’d spend in the future on email and the internet.
The latest new thing I’ve been (unsuccessfully) resisting is social networking web-sites. They eat up time and they’re intrusive and annoying. Of course I did still have to log on and try them, though, as I am pathologically attracted to new experiences.
Nowhere is this more prevalent than with food. I have eaten crocodile, snake, frog’s legs, alligator, several varieties of deer and all manner of insects and crustaceans. Basically, if anything has moved near me, I’ve tried to eat it. This adventurousness in food also extends to other areas and so most weeks I’m writing articles on everything from vampire hunters to 1940s knitwear.
My friends and I try to discover new favourite restaurants and bars when we go out so that we’re not constantly going to the same places. There’s no harm in having your favourite ‘local’ but if you start to find your bum fits rather too snugly into your favourite seat or stool, it’s time to find another haunt, my friend.
Occasionally you will find that you try something new, a new dish, say, and it’s so awful, you want to gag. This is also good because you can chalk that down to experience and know never to order it again. Think of a baby. His instinct is to shove every thing he gets his hands on into his mouth and if his hands contain nothing, then they’re going in there instead. Everything is explored through touch and taste. We become jaded because we start to make assumptions about what is good and what is bad. Trying the new puts us back in ‘baby’ mode and it can be a very exciting time.
The benefit of all this interest in the new and untried is that a) you never get bored and b) you can sing for your supper. People tend to do pretty much the same things as their peers and the ones they gravitate towards are those who push the boundaries of what is the usual.
My friend is an 80-year-old shamanic healer and she’s spent years studying plant medicine in the Amazon. She can’t stand talking to most people her own age as they are very constricted in the things they will talk about. ‘I don’t want to know about health problems and grandchildren,’ she says, bluntly. ‘I want to know about the nature of the world, how people can heal and be healed. I want to know what the stars are made of, rather than what the stock market is doing to their investments’. I do believe that Iona will one day find out what the stars are made of as she is completely unstoppable in finding out what everything else is made of!
Here’s an idea for you…
Today find a recipe that you’ve never tried before (it can be a very simple assembling one if you’re a hopeless cook) and make it tonight. Better still, invent something of your own. A distinct and fabulous cuisine called ‘Indo-Chinese’ developed when Indian and Chinese chefs in North India took the techniques and ingredients of Chinese cooking and combined them with Indian spicing so don’t be afraid of adding your own touch.
Defining idea…
‘Do not go where the path may lead; go instead where there is no path and leave a trail.’
RALPH WALDO EMERSON
How did it go?
Q I suggested a few new things for me and my wife to try in the bedroom but she was ‘disgusted and appalled’ and now I feel embarrassed for having asked. What should I do?
A Oh dear! Our sexual preferences are probably one of the most individual things about us so what rocks one person’s boat may not do so for another. However, a healthy relationship is one in which you can discuss your likes, dislikes and curiosities without feeling judged by your lover. Explain to your wife how you feel and make it clear that this discussion is not a pre-cursor to nagging her about trying new things but is merely an attempt at more openness in the relationship.
Q My husband won’t leave the house or try anything new, not even a new pasta sauce. I’m at my wits’ end, I’m so bored. What should I do?
A What’s stopping you trying new things without him? Cook that new pasta sauce and settle down to enjoy every bite while he looks on eating his same-old, same-old. I bet the smell and look entices him enough to try at least one bite. Start small like this and when he sees you traipsing off to your salsa class every week, he’s bound to want to get in on some of the fun.
Q New things make me nervous as I had some tremendous upheavals in my youth and I don’t want to feel anchorless again. Am I too stuck in my ways?
A You have fear and that’s only normal when you’re talking about steppingout of your comfort zone. Take it easy on yourself and try one tiny newthing each week. It may be a new brand of bread or perhaps a tie in a different colour to the one you normally wear. Little and often will do to spice up your life as much as the big changes.